old years

every year, around the last days of december, i get a little antsy. i think we all do, especially in anticipation of the start of a new year around the corner. those last days of december are usually thrown away in a flurry of anxiety regarding past regrets, new (and especially fervent) promises, and apprehension of what a new year will bring. while i've always been wedded to the symbolism of the january 1 new year, grace constantly reminds me that every day is a new opportunity for growth and change. obviously true, but still hard to remember. so, late this year, i've tried to integrate this lesson into my life by making these last few days of the year particularly meaningful, and peaceful, by renouncing the usual resolution making and stock taking, and instead talking long walks amid snowflakes, watching old movies, and talking by candlelight. maybe because of this, i've never been sadder to see a year end.
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